Moral Revolution begins with a story about a 15-year-old boy named Johnny, who sees a beautiful wedding ring in a jewelry store. When he looks at it, he sees the woman of his dreams. So he works hard all through high school and eventually buys the ring, only to be drafted into the Vietnam war. He keeps the ring in his helmet all through the war, even going back under fire to retrieve his helmet when it falls off one time. He is wounded, but at the hospital, his nurse is the woman. They eventually get married, and he gives her the ring. Being from a rich family, she sees only the monetary value, does not take precautions with the ring, and loses it the next day. What she did not understand is that the value of the ring is not the materials in the ring, but the difficulty in getting the ring to her. The story is an illustration of the value of our virginity. Remaining a virgin (male or female) until marriage is difficult so that we have something valuable to present to our spouse.
Actually accomplishing this is the subject of most of the rest of the book. The first step is that we live from our virtues, so we need to decide that one of our virtues is remaining chaste. To accomplish this, we need to make sure that we think according to our virtues; having sexual fantasies in our mind is not a great way to remain pure. Nor is covering up our pain in pleasure, commonly pornography and masturbation, as this leads to a controlling addiction. Accountability with people is helpful in creating and revising a plan to stay pure.
Another component is acting like a prince or princess. A princess is not attracted to slobs and sluggards, so if you want a princess, learn to be a prince. Being a prince involves things like treating your date like the King’s daughter—bring her back better than you found her! A prince has character: he is a man of integrity, honesty, confidence, and self-sacrificing love. Likewise, a princess does not advertise her body, but has self-respect, acts noble, gives of herself, and seeks the best for her prince.
When you find someone that you are interested in, take it slowly. Being driven by our emotions or sex drive is a terrible way to create a lifelong partnership. Instead, make sure you are emotionally healthy, and check that they are someone of good character who is going the same direction as you. If traveling the world is important to you, choose someone who is okay with that. Communication is important, so be vulnerable with each other. If things do not ultimately work out, mourn with God, and continue being vulnerable in your relationships.
American culture has been attacking the value of sex for many years. Surprisingly, one of the ways this has happened is with prudery, trying to cover up sex as sort of an embarrassment. The fact is, God made sex, and it is good. Hiding it only gives license to the world, which correctly realizes that sex is good, just does not accept the limitations. Modern culture wars against sex by using it as a tool to sell movies and other products and make more money. And since modern culture does not see the value in a covenant relationship where you commit to love the other person regardless of what happens, it embraces living together. Living together is inherently fear-based, and is essentially trying to control the other person with the fear that you might leave. This is desiring intimacy without covenant, and only produces pain.
Another war is not actually on sexuality but on the future generation. We have become so dependent on pleasure and intimacy without costs, that we have rationalized killing babies as “freedom of choice.” Our duplicity as a society is revealed as we persist in this view, despite images of babies being aborted that look like they are screaming in pain, despite terrible post-abortion conditions, and despite laws that remain on the books like if you kill a pregnant woman you are held guilty for two murders. “Fetus” is Latin for offspring, but has come to mean “a blob of inhuman tissue that is okay to abort until it suddenly becomes a human baby moments before it exits the womb.” Vallotton observes that the groups that are most familiar with mass murder through dehumanization—Jews, Native Americans, and African Americans—almost as if something were warring against our future generation and these groups especially.
Throughout the book, but especially towards the end, Vallotton tells several stories of people who failed to maintain their virginity. In each of them his perspective is that failure is not permanent. God is always seeking to restore us, and these stories offer real-life examples of his restoration and hope that He will do it again. The process is to repent of the action and the heart motive that lead to it, renounce it, ask God for forgiveness, ask God to break the ties that sex creates with our sexual partners, and ask God to restore your virginity. Not only is this an emotional reset, but God has restored the physical hymen in hundreds of women. Nothing is impossible; God can always restore.